The Letter Game - Random Correspondence, Non-MWPP, Non-Voldypants et al Options

[ronsmyman]

30 June 1976
Keswick

Dearest Alice,

We arrived earlier today, and after unpacking and a light supper I was given leave to roam about the place. It’s quite nice. When my parents told me we would be taking some sort of nature retreat, I was concerned that we would be stuck in a completely uncivilized place swarming with every nasty creature imaginable, but so far the only creature I’ve seen is a stag, he seems to be following me, I’ve seen him no less than three times. He has the most beautiful rack of horns that I ever saw. Maybe not as large as some others but they seem to shine like hair that is constantly brushed.

Tomorrow, my parents have decided that we are all going hiking. Ick. Walking about for hours staring at trees that are all the same, not exactly my idea of fun. Petunia seems to be enjoying herself though. She has this new beau named Vernon, that she is constantly writing to. I think she’s written him twelve letters already and he was the one who saw us off at the station this morning. I think Petunia and James would be perfect for each other they are both obsessive to a scary point.

Speaking of James, he has been writing me all summer. I know it’s only been five days, but still, he’s written me daily if not more often. Sometimes his letters are insufferable! His last one though didn’t reek of sarcasm and pomposity though. But I still know it’s there.

So, how are things with Frank? Has he finally gotten up the courage to meet you parents? Keep me informed, you know James scares away any hopes of my having a boyfriend while I’m at Hogwarts so I have to live vicariously through you. I hope you are spending your hols in a relaxing manner. We have to get together some time after I return to the city. Maybe I can talk my parents into letting us go spend a weekend in Bath, I’ve never summered there before and I always thought it would be fun.

Love,

[zymurgy]

Dear Mr. Pettigrew,
It is my pained duty to inform you that you haven't returned "A History of Magic " by Bagshott, Bathilda, to the Hogwarts Library. In fact, the book is now over six months overdue, and your fines (for this, and the replacement for the book returned oozing green slime) have reached a total of twenty five galleons.
sincerly,
Madman Pince